It's weird to me sometimes. When I think back, almost five years ago, when we started this journey of adoption, I really didn't have a clue as to what it would be like to have another child in this house and love him. Think about that for a minute....... We started our journey to Aiden five years ago, first saw his picture in July of 2010, and now it's almost been a year since we first met him and brought him home. It just doesn't seem possible.
Back to what I was saying, five years ago I could not have possibly imagined what it would be like to have another child in this house and love him. I really couldn't imagine the feelings of another child being here. I never wondered if Aiden would like us, love us, or even tolerate us! I always knew he'd be okay. Really didn't think about any of it. When we were in South Korea waiting to meet him for the first time and pick him up, it was really nerve wracking, and he was very upset leaving his foster parents and going with us. He cried himself to sleep when we returned to our hotel with him, he slept for two hours, and then woke somewhat happy. At that time I was expecting the worst (it's the only way I can prepare myself in those type situations - expect the worst and hope for the best, that way I'm somewhat prepared). But Aiden did so well from that point on. Please don't think our life with him has been a piece of cake this last year, but Aiden really took to me the first day in South Korea. After that day, I knew he'd be okay, he'd love us, and we'd most certainly love him.
So over the last 11 months, Aiden has blossomed. He didn't talk much in the beginning. He was 14 months old when we brought him home. He had been hearing Korean spoken his whole life up to that point. So, yeah, how could he understand any English, much less speak any of it? But as time went on, he understood more and more. He still didn't say hardly any English, but he understood nearly all we were saying to him. Back in September of last year, Aiden started saying a few new words every now and then. The more time that went by, the more he'd try to say. Yah! He was trying to speak English. I was kind of glad to see this. On one hand, I was glad to see he'd actually understood English before he tried to speak it, meaning he understood what words meant what. And he felt comfortable to try, which was awesome to see.
The one word Aiden wouldn't say for a long time was, "mommy, or mama". Up until that point, he'd never called me that. And you'd think this would have worried me, but it really didn't. I just felt as though when he was ready to call me that, he would. I knew he'd know exactly what it meant and why he was calling me that. We would show him pictures of all of us, point to our pictures and ask who we were. He'd only point to Taylor's picture and say, "Tay Tay". We'd point to Mike's picture or mine and he wouldn't say anything for a while. We would say mama or dada and point to our pictures, he'd still not say anything. But soon, Aiden would soon call Mike dada, or dadee, but still not call me by name yet.
I think it was around November and December that he really started saying mommy to me, calling me that to get my attention. And it surprised me! Really it did. The first time he called me that, I looked at Taylor and said, "did he just call me mommy?" She said, "yes, he did". Actually, I was very happy to hear him call me mommy. At that point, I knew he knew, I was his mommy and what it meant. He's so certain when he says it too. My first thought wasn't, "finally", it was more, "awww, he knows I'm his mommy" and he "gets it". He totally gets it!!
I always knew Aiden would love us, in due time, just as we would love him. For some people that love doesn't come right away. I was one of those people. I could never imagine what it would be like to love Aiden. It just wasn't happening back before we met him. I had to meet him, hold him, live with him, and grow with him before that love was there. Don't misunderstand when I say that love wasn't there. I didn't know how to love him yet. I loved him as a child of mine, but it wasn't until I got to know him, that my love for him was a solid, "you are my child" kind of love.
Now, we'll point to our pictures and ask who we are. Point to Mike, he says dada, point to me, he says mommy, point to Taylor's picture, and of course he says Tay Tay. It's really amazing to me how much love this kid has in his heart! He gives hugs all the time and is the most loving little guy! So now I know for sure, he loves us, we most certainly love him, we are his family, he is our son, Taylor's little brother, and he gets it! He totally gets it!
And, don't forget that he can say "Nana!" Never mind that he says Nana when referring to either Jim or me. :-) And, he can yell out the back door for our inside dog to come in just as loud as I can! Becky, come on! (He yells "eckie-on!) That's close enough.
ReplyDeleteOh, and that reminds me that I want to add here that Jim and I both were amazed at how quickly he began to understand English. Not just a word here and there, but whole sentences. He understood so much so quickly..just within a few weeks, it seemed. And, talk about remotes, TVs, cell phones....well, that's another entry in your blog that you may want to tell about, so I'll hush. :-)